The scriptures of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints contain a well-know verse about forgiveness that I heard many times during my life in the Church. In Doctrine and Covenants Section 64 Verse 10 we read:
“I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men.”
This is probably inspired by verses dealing with forgiveness in the New Testament, such as Matthew 6:14-15 and 18:21-22.
I used to accept these scriptures without thinking, but after being exposed to the work of the philosopher Alan Watts, I’ve gained a different, and I think more true and useful perspective on forgiveness, as well as living, loving, and all forms of human behavior really. I’m particularly interested in his application of Gregory Bateson’s concept of the “double-bind” to certain kinds of behavior that we tend to require of ourselves and others.
In his 1966 book, The Book On the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are, Watts wrote “Nothing fails like success – because the self-imposed task of our society and all its members is a contradiction: to force things to happen which are acceptable only when they happen without force.”
And so, in response to The Church and The New Testament, and as inspired by Alan Watts, I created the following graphic using a photo I purchased from iStock and my original design and words:
The social double-bind game can be phrased in several ways:
The first rule of the game is that it is not a game.
Everyone must play.
You must love us.
You must go on living.
Be yourself, but play a consistent and acceptable role.
Control yourself and be natural.
Try to be sincere.
Essentially, this game is a demand for spontaneous behavior of certain kinds. Living, loving, being natural or sincere – all these are spontaneous forms of behavior: they happen “of themselves” like digesting food or growing hair. As soon as they are forced they acquire that unnatural, contrived, and phony atmosphere which everyone deplores – weak and scentless like forced flowers and tasteless like forced fruit. Life and love generate effort, but effort will not generate them. Faith – in other people, and in oneself – is the attitude of allowing the spontaneous to be spontaneous, in its own way and in its own time.
-Alan Watts, The Book On the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are
Mormon Mouse 